At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Boobs are out for the taking
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Randomize
