I think my vagina is haunted
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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