Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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