Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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