Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
