By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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