i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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