I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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