whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
