haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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