he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize