I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Randomize