No stitches, just platelets and will power
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I believe in your delicious
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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