girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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