Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
