Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize