I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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