I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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