shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
you made out with another girl for some wings
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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