I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
