Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
