If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Randomize
