With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
