the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize