margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
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