it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
