I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Randomize
