They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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