Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
