Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
