Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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