Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
grandma shit on top of the toilet
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Randomize
