I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
