I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Randomize
