i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
