What a fucking waste of an outfit
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
