ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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