Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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