Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize