his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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