Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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