We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Pooping to opera.
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