if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
