this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
