david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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