Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
