I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I'm like, not good at living.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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