we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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