Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
