Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
